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words

July 17, 2012

i said i don’t know you anymore and i meant it. i find it hard to forgive you, to let it go to move on. i let my draw bridge all the way down and then you plundered my town leaving my walls destroyed. Fear paralyses me making me unable to move unable to think even. Processing what you did and did not do is a scary feet I cant even imagine doing. There are too many layers of you and me and like peeling an onion all these layers will make me cry rivers of tears till i cant see and the scent/essence of you is stuck to my fingers. I cant wash you out with even the strongest of soap and disinfectant. Its been forever and yet you still linger and I don’t know what to do still. I know i don’t want you here but how can i get rid of you when you got into the inner cycle of my throne room. And then there is this new development, what am I to do? Where and as whom do I stand in this? I need to not care to just not care I need to not care, I can’t hurt again not over you not again

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